My first choice of group member for my celebrity group would be the celebrity du jour, Caitlyn Jenner. Have you noticed that her transgender persona is a supermodel (with a cosmetics line on the way–no less) and not a plain but accomplished woman like Janet Reno, Linda Hunt or Mary Jo White. The Post quotes ESPN that says Caitlyn is brave for her self acceptance; but it seems to me that it’s is not who but what she is that’s the real issue. Bruce Jenner has morphed from one type of an object to another. In an earlier blog, I noted that there is no such thing as a gay or straight personality. Are we so naïve to think that plastic surgery alters our inner life? Does changing physical appearance change character structure? I think not. For example, several years ago, a young woman sought treatment for anxiety and depression. She was scheduled to have another plastic surgery ( one in a long list of cosmetic surgeries) all before she was 30. When I asked her what was wrong with her body the way it was, a floodgate opened and feelings and memories of an abusive and neglected childhood emerged. She hated her body because she hated herself for being needy and dependent. In other words, she hated herself for being human. A combination of individual and group therapy helped her to see herself differently than the way she learned to see herself as a child in her family. She canceled that surgery and hasn’t had another one ever since. With the support and also with the confrontation of the group, about her self-destructive self attitude, she has begun to heal. In a well run group, members can step on each other’s toes without ruining the shine. Members can confront each other in a way that might feel too judgmental if it came from the leader.
While it may be said that Caitlyn Jenner has become a symbol for civil rights, being a symbol is just that–another type of object. Has becoming a woman altered Bruce/Caitlyn’s ability to have an emotionally authentic relationship with the significant people in her life– like her children? I wonder. I believe that the true measure of a man is his relationships with his children. I’m not impressed with a man’s wealth or professional status. Jenner has many children. I’d like to hear from those who haven’t publicly supported his transgender life change; even the ones who are supportive seem equivocal. If you read between the lines in PEOPLE MAGAZINE’s interview with Jenner’s daughter, Casandra who is quoted as saying that her relationship with father still needs ‘a lot of work’, there is still trouble in paradise. Apparently (no pun intended) physical transformation didn’t necessarily lead to a personality transformation. How could it? Group could help with that.