Angie’s eyes would often go out of focus during intense group interactions. At those moments, she seemed far away; she retreated into her own world. So it came as a surprise to her to learn that her self-absorption had an effect on other people in her group. Sarah told her:” It’s hurtful when you emotionally  disappear.  I feel abandoned by you and pushed away. The least you can do is say good-bye when you emotionally check-out of the room”. No one had ever told Angie that before; she said. It helped her to understand why people in her ‘real life’ seemed to pull away from her when she is depressed.  She leaves them first. Angie didn’t know how she came across in her relationships with significant others in her life.